On This Hill I Am Willing To Die

Normally, I do not consider my children "strong-willed," which could be symptomatic of my weak-will as a mother.  I mean, there's nothing to fight about when you get your own way all the time.  That's one possibility.  Another is that we've all just adjusted to each other and they know what to expect and I know what to expect and so there's no use getting all in a crumple about stuff that doesn't really matter.
We rarely have discussions about what really matters except when there is a difference between what I think really matters and what my children think really matters.  Normally these kinds of conversations do not get too out of hand because we give lots of choices that strongly encourage our kids to see things our way.  ("I know you don't think it matters to eat your vegetables and that's fine, but daddy and I don't think it matters to eat dessert so it's your choice," for example.)

Mostly, we don't make our kids do things and yet we have pretty helpful, responsible kids who do their chores and obey the rules at school and eat their vegetables.

There is one thing we force our children to do and this has summoned the strong-will of our young son, which emerges with Hulk-like fury.

I've heard it said by wiser mothers that when dealing with a strong-willed child, one ought not engage in a battle unless one is willing to die on that hill.  I like that advice.  The one thing Bo and I have decided our kids will do, no matter what, is become strong swimmers.  That's not to say that if they become ax murderers, but they can swim we'll be satisfied as parents, but you know what I mean--it's a non-negotiable.  Pretty much, every summer they can count on taking swim lessons or joining swim team or some kind of organized swimming instruction that will improve their water safety and swimming ability until, at some point, we have deemed them not-likely-to-drown-in-open-water and they can graduate from this family requirement.

Apparently, we have a difference of opinion about whether or not "becoming a strong swimmer through organized instruction" matters.  The hard-fought battle ended with a pizza party to celebrate the completion of swim lessons, but may I admit that mama almost went down in that war plane?  Seriously.  At 7 years of age, the weapon systems have become so advanced that I almost don't realize I'm being shot down.  When Hulk didn't win, he employed Black Widow, that manipulative spy who let's you think you are doing the interrogation when in reality, you are the one being interrogated.  Sneaky.  How does a 7 year old become a master manipulator?  I don't know, but I've got one on my hands and he is gooood.  I can simultaneously cringe and beam with pride when I write that because I do want my kids to strive for excellence and he could become an excellent spy someday wearing down the defenses of the enemy through his cunning...that is, if he doesn't use his talents to become an ax murderer.  I must remind him of always using his abilities for good.

For those of you with real strong-willed children, may your war plane stay air-worthy and your kids become strong swimmers!

My No-Blog Summer

For those of you I haven't seen or who didn't get the update on Facebook, Bo got a job!!  I'm sorry I left you hanging.  He started a new job with a great little company in our great little city of Ralston.  It's doing home care, which is exactly what he wanted to do and we are so, so thankful that it all lined up quickly and that none of Roy's fears of being homeless and eating out of dumpsters came true.  (Could he be a worst case scenario thinker like his mama?  That is not the quality I was hoping to pass on to my children.)  Anyway, thank you for praying and supporting us through this.  We have felt so loved and blessed.

I had this great idea for a series for my blog called "Lessons from the Pit" just keeping with the hairy arm pit theme from my earlier post.  However, prior to summer starting I had resolved not to blog during the summer.  Actually, I had resolved not to do a lot of things during the summer.  Mainly, stuff I put on my to-do list that no one cares about except me, like blogging and sewing a cover for the giant hole in our ottoman or organizing our filing cabinet.  

The older my kids get the faster time flies and I realize that summer is this gift where we can spend so much time together and reconnect and recalibrate some things that have gone wonky through the busyness of life.  This summer my kids begged me not to send them to sports camps or VBS or any of that summer busy stuff.  When I asked them what they wanted to do this summer their unanimous reply was, "STAY HOME!"  

This is not easy for me.  I work from home and frankly, it's not that fabulous to work from home with kids around all day every day.  What I realized is that all of the stuff I drag my kids to is really for my benefit.  JUST GIVE ME SOME PEACE AND QUIET!!  

Now summer is over and it is so quiet I could cry, but the last thing I am wishing for is that I would have kept up my blog or that I would have sewn that cover or that I had all of my utility bills in order.  My necessary work got done one way or another and they weren't super excited about showing apartments or running to the office, but we all survived.  They even earned some money by hosing off air conditioning units and cleaning hallways, which they promptly spent on Pokemon cards and rollerskating, the only thing they really wanted to leave home for.

So welcome back to my blog.  For those of you east coast people with kids still at home--get of the computer and enjoy the chaos!!  It will be over before you know it.