Lest you think me a total whiner, allow me to disclose some of the enormous benefits of being skinny:
1. Finding good stuff left on the clearance rack.
2. I don't have to count anything when I eat. This is a big deal for someone like me who has a hard time keeping track of things. Weighing things, counting calories, points or carbs would really stress me out.
3. Fitting into awesome hiding spots in hide & seek.
4. No problem squeezing into tight spots at work (like when I have to clean behind refrigerators and washing machines--super handy).
5. Sitting in the middle seat on an airplane causes me no stress.
6. People make all kinds of positive assumptions about me, even if they aren't true.
I'm sure there are endless benefits of being skinny, but it's #6 that I would like to address today. While I find it a definite benefit that people automatically assume that I am energetic and hard working and athletic, none of these are particularly true of me. Believe me, I like being given the benefit of the doubt. I would much rather have people start out with a positive assumption rather than my friends who are actually energetic, hard working and athletic (or at least in decent shape...I'll explain what I mean by that in a minute), being assumed that they are lazy and undisciplined because of their build.
Don't say you are free from stereotyping. Even kids do it. One boy announced to his class at school that I teach him basketball. Mind you, there is no way I have ever taught him one single thing about basketball because I, in fact, know nothing about it. It's actually my husband who teaches kids about basketball. All I do is stand next to him looking like I could play basketball and it works some kind of Jedi mind trick on them. ("Ooh. She's skinny and above average height for a woman, she must be a basketball player.")
Ok, ok, you might be one of those skinny people who worked really hard to become so and you'd like to take credit for it. That is fabulous and I applaud you. But not every skinny person is self-made. Some of them were born and, by the grace of God, are not subject to a struggle with weight and food. That would be me. But let me tell you that I battle the demons of laziness, discipline and self-control all the time. You just can't see it. (And let me clarify that I do not believe that all fat people are lazy, undisciplined and lack self-control--that's NOT what I mean. Sheesh, I know I'm getting myself into big trouble on this one.)
Before I dig a hole too deep to ever climb out of, let me just get to the point. Here's the downside, for me, of being skinny:
I have no motivation to exercise.
OK, I know what you are thinking, "Really, that's your downside?"
Yes, that's it. Believe me when I say that I am flattered when people look at me and assume that I am a runner, but I would much rather be a runner because then I could run without sucking wind so hard I think I'm going to pass out. Truth is, just because you're skinny does not make you in shape.
If I were being chased by a hungry animal I could out run it for about 5 seconds. I'd like to increase that to at least a minute or so just so that I would have time for my life to flash before my eyes before the thing chews open my jugular. Call that the weirdest fitness goal you've ever heard, but that is my goal.
Now my sister thinks you can't really be fat and in shape. Her theory is that you can be fat and strong but not really fit. I tend to disagree. I know plenty of overweight people who could outrun me any day, and they could definitely beat the crap out of me (and I don't mean by sitting on me). And they are way more disciplined about exercising than I am. I am skinny but not fit. My sister also tells me that she would rather be skinny and out of shape than fat and in shape. I totally agree, BUT what about being skinny and in shape? Wouldn't that be the best?
OK so what I just figured out is that there really is no downside to being skinny, all that is for me is a really lame excuse to be lazy in the area of exercise. I mean, just because my goal is not weight loss, does not mean I can't have other goals.
So here are my 2012 motivations for exercise:
I would like to participate in a friendly game of soccer without having to play goalie the whole time because I can't keep up with my super athletic husband and children. Ok that one will probably never happen. Scratch that. I need to keep my goals realistic.
I would like to not throw my back out when giving my kid a piggy back ride to his room.
I would like my backside to not jiggle. Hey--just because there's not a lot there does not make it any less jiggly.
I would like more energy and to be less crabby. I've heard that regular exercise helps with these things. Wouldn't my family just love it if I did not throw the regular hormonal temper tantrum? I think so.
I would like to out-run a wild animal for one minute before I die.
These are the things I will train for. I have found my motivation.
Darn it. Now my title is trash, but I can't change it now because "finding my real motivation to exercise" is a super lame title for a blog. Oh well, leave your scathing comments below. I'm ready for them.
7 comments:
Well, Sarah, I am one of those people who the person on the street looks at and assumes I’m lazy, undisciplined and stupid. But, I find nothing scathe-worthy in your post. You’re right – our culture would have us believe that the ultimate goal is skinniness. So, it’s easy to see why you could feel no need for discipline in exercise if you’re already thin. I have so many friends who start exercising to lose weight and when they don’t see the results they want, they quit. And I ask, but did you feel better? Yes. Did you have more energy? Yes. Could you do more things? Yes. (confused stare) Um….. what’s wrong with those results??? But, that’s our culture for you. In polls Americans say they would rather have cancer than be fat. People don’t want health as much as they want the appearance of health. I’m on the other end of the spectrum from you. I know that no matter how much I exercise it will never make me skinny. Thinner perhaps, but not thin. So, if skinny is my goal, I’ll never have motivation to exercise. But, my goal is to be in better shape, to have my body work better. I think your reasons for wanting to be in shape are excellent. I most of all love that you want to have time for your life to flash before your eyes while being chased by a bear!
I found that my motivation came from finding a sport I love, and wanting to do the best I can at it. I do more squats to skate faster, more crunches to be more stable, and more burpees to skate longer. My initial motivation came from realizing that if T ran away from me, I couldn't catch him and keep him safe. I can now :D
Lol... Concrete Mama = Linnea!
You crack me up! Nothing scathing to say, honestly.
Up until my mid-20's, I was thin. I'm now pretty overweight, so I can say that I've been on both sides of the issue as an adult. I can say, with all honesty, that being skinny is much easier on just about every level (and you identified most of them).
I also don't find the negatives of being overweight providing endless sources of exercise motivation, either. You might think that they would - and I suppose, for some people, they do. But not me. Working out for vanity's sake (to get skinny) never keeps me going. It's simply too hard, and that idea of skinny may never happen, or if it does, it's much too far away to be a helpful goal.
The only time I've been successful with exercise is when it's connected to a big WHY that has to do with my family or my everyday life. I got in pretty good shape when we moved out here because I wanted to keep up with Matt hiking; I dropped weight when I was bellydancing because I was performing a lot and it hurt my feet less when I weighed less. Now, getting in shape is all about keeping up with a toddler and carrying up the stairs, and wanting to take her hiking and camping and swimming and all that.
But, you know, I'd still love to be skinny again, at least skinny enough to be out of plus sizes and have some shopping freedom, that would make life a LOT easier in a small town. :-)
I thought of another positive for being skinny that I wanted to share. When I run, my boobs are so small they don't really bounce around and hurt me. I love that! I only know this because of complaints I've heard from large chested friends, and from when I ran while breastfeeding (not at the same time--that would be pretty hard). I think it just makes me feel more content about having shrunk to an "A" cup after nursing 2 babies. Finding the silver lining friends...that's what it's all about.
Thanks for all your comments. I love that you take time to read my randomness and write feedback.
This topic is interesting to me since I joined a gym and started working out regularly about a month ago. I wanted to add to your list of benefits of working out: cardio exercise builds a healthy heart and prevents heart disease, and resistance training builds strong bones and prevents osteoporosis. The body, mind and soul are linked, so when you strengthen your body, it affects all areas of your self and life.
Since I started working out a month ago, I haven't lost any weight. In fact, I think I've gained a pound or two. That means I've built muscle.
This culture worships skinny. But would you rather be skinny like Gwyneth Paltrow or muscular like Madonna? It's time to be strong, not just cute.
I like your list of goals to put on the fridge door!
Love your blog (just found it) and your reasons for going to the gym. Being able to outrun a wild animal is on my list of motivations, too.
I'm currently struggling with gaining weight as I gain a little muscle/lose a little fat, so I'm using weekly pictures as a gauge of my progress instead of numbers.
Also, as a fellow fairly-skinny person with really good genetics, I can say that a combo of a little weight lifting (I use the machines at the gym instead of the scary free weights) and a little cardio has been good for me. Cardio alone unfortunately didn't give me the tone I was looking for.
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