Blog Revival

Our family is wrapping up a very busy season of life. OK, it's mostly me. I am wrapping up a busy season of life by stepping out of paid ministry at our church. Two and a half years ago I was asked to consider working part time (10-15 hours) in Kids Connect on Sunday mornings overseeing our birth through preschool classes. At first I said, "Absolutely not. I do not need one more thing to juggle." But as I thought and prayed about it more, I realized that I really wanted to say yes. I don't know if it was wise. Working two jobs was definitely a stretch, even though they were both flexible. There were definitely times when I felt pulled in too many directions.

Here is what I do know. We had been continually praying for God to provide for us. I was offered a job where my employer said they would work around my current commitments doing something that fit my gifting and was meaningful. I knew that I couldn't handle it on my own, but as I prayed and sought God's direction these are the verses I believe He gave me:

"I know, O LORD, that a man's life is not his own; it is not for man to direct his steps."
Jeremiah 10:23

"If the LORD delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand."
Psalm 37:23-24

"A man's steps are directed by the LORD. How then can anyone understand his own way?"
Proverbs 20:24

I wrote in my journal, "God I feel like taking the job at CCC Sarpy makes no sense on the one hand. On the other hand, I really want to do it."

So I said, "Yes." It didn't make sense. I was pretty sure I would fail unless God's hand was leading. I've struggled and wrestled with feeling like I was not "enough" in just about every facet of my life from ministry work, to my full time job to motherhood to being a wife. I kept waiting for the hatchet to fall, but no one would fire me. Instead I have experienced grace everywhere.

The grace of a husband who took on laundry folding duties without being asked.

The grace of a boss who says out loud, "Thank God you came to work for me."

The grace of a boss who says, "There is always "more" you can do in ministry so good leaders say no."

The grace of volunteers who say, "We like working with you." (and I fill in...despite my lack of organization or other good qualities that I feel that I should have)

And a thousand other graces that have come in this season.

At one point during this journey I was really feeling like I could not maintain this pace, but when I would read God's Word he would take me to Nehemiah and I would read about the workers who by day would build the wall and by night become soldiers to fight off the enemy. And I would be strengthened again to continue to do what God had for me in this season.

I will share more about this season coming to an end because I am reviving my blog and have committed to myself to publish something every day. This is one of the things I feel like I must do with my "extra" time. It might not be pretty or polished, but I will push publish whether it's ready or not.